Cooking Kids

Easy Recipe: How to Make a Gifted Underachiever

Today, I’m going to show you how to make a gifted underachiever.
It sounds like it might be difficult, but many people have successfully completed this recipe.

 

 

Ingredients:

(1) Bright, curious child
(1-2) Adults who know nothing about giftedness (more is even better)
100 shakes of “Stop asking questions.”
1000 shakes of “You’re not as smart as you think you are.”

 

Directions:

Blend all ingredients. Turn up the heat and let the ingredients simmer over time.
If mixed thoroughly and vigorously, simmering may only take a few years.
If ingredients are not combining well, add daily: 1-2 heaping helpings of self doubt and increase the heat.

 

Caution: Be sure not to praise for effort and individuality- only conformity.

 

Continue to turn up the heat over time adding ample helpings of “You’re weird” combined with “Why can’t you be normal?”

 

If a mentor or other adult (or gifted child) understands the child’s interests or intellect and all ingredients above are not blended well enough, your recipe may fail. To guarantee success keep child (and by now possibly as an adult) away from self-directed learning; especially about giftedness. Add ignorance and the improperly labeled “arrogance” (which should read “confidence”).

 

Serves: No one.

 

 

 
Next time, join me for the Recipe for Gifted Success.

 

 

 

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6 thoughts on “Easy Recipe: How to Make a Gifted Underachiever

  1. My teachers rustled this up with me. I didn’t fit in their square hole so was sidelined as a round peg. Something I wish I had been able to change.

    Like

  2. I often read recipes and make my own shortcuts. Here is my no-fail shortcut:

    Ingredients:
    One gifted child
    One teacher who resents gifted children who correct her

    No mixing or heating necessary. Guaranteed results.

    Seriously, this is a brilliant article. Your writing is pure genius!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. đŸ™‚ Sad that some teachers feel the need for superiority in a classroom surrounded by children. My students would always laugh when I told them I wanted them to be smarter than me. I’d say, “We need someone to fix the problems in this world.”

      P.S. Thank you for the compliment. I’ll take it.

      Like

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